The Odd Blog

And when our cubs grow / We'll show you what war is good for

Talking ’bout my girl…

Posted by That Other Mike on 14/12/2007

My Girl…My fiancee wife and I currently live apart. So far, so unusual. We live really apart: she’s in the US and right now I’m in England still. It’s a tough situation to be in, to be honest. We’ve been a couple for getting on for seven years now, and our being together has been delayed by various factors, such as family issues (as in, mine are mostly bastards who deserve a good kicking) and her divorce.

It’s not a nice situation to be in, really, so far away from someone you love. What really keeps me going is that things are soon going to be coming together for us. To a relative value of soon, anyway. Assuming we don’t run into any major issues regarding immigration, we should be permanently together within a year or so. I know, that sounds like a long time to wait, but when you set it against the length of time we’ve spent apart and the time we will spend together afterwards, it’s not so bad. The hope that we will end up in the same place permanently has always kept us both going, too.

That’s not the only thing which has been a difficulty for us. My family, of the deserving a kicking variety mentioned above, attempted through subtle and unsubtle methods to end the relationship; not least, when she was here for a six months stay, by evicting me and therefore her from the family home. I’m not just talking being thrown out; I’m talking an actual legal process to evict. I believe the idea was to force me to beg to come back and abandon her; it has spectacularly backfired. I no longer talk to them or even acknowledge them in the street. The exact phrase, I think, is “dead to me”.

Of course, you might have asked, why doesn’t she just come here? Her son. She doesn’t want to uproot him from school or his life, and his biological father would surely cause trouble. He’s that kind of man. I look forward to being there, though; I love him like my own. He even calls me his dad, which makes me so proud. And I would never view him as the problem; uprooting is not something which is a problem for me. I love them both too much not to, and I’m not so in love with where I live that I would never leave.

And speaking of proud – I’m proud to be with my girl. She’s a loving, kind, sweet and generous person, who is funny and interesting, who I can always talk to, who always laughs at my jokes (even when unfunny), who always wants to spend time with me and who I always want to spend time with, even when we argue. She’s my best friend, and I love her so much I don’t think I could ever even give you more than the smallest idea of what I feel for her.

It’s hard to live apart as we do right now, but it’s going to be easy later.

My girl is my best friend and most compatible person in the world. In your face, world! 😀

P.S. We married on the 20th March 2008.

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32 Responses to “Talking ’bout my girl…”

  1. Man, that’s a tough situation. I will pray for you, if you have no objections. It is the most I can offer anyone.

  2. So does this mean that you will be a Texan too? You can join us in our escapism!

  3. Selena Parsley said

    She’s in Texas? Kraft said she is in Texas. Maybe I can invite her to church! 😀 j/messing

  4. Mike said

    Man, that’s a tough situation. I will pray for you, if you have no objections. It is the most I can offer anyone.

    Well, you can if you like. I’ve not really got any objection to that.

    So does this mean that you will be a Texan too? You can join us in our escapism!

    Well, we’re looking at possibly moving.

    She’s in Texas? Kraft said she is in Texas. Maybe I can invite her to church!

    Definitely Texan. I think it might be a wasted invitation, though…

  5. Long-distance relationships are difficult enough without the added problem of an “unsupportive” family, Mike. I feel for you, mate. Sounds like it’s going to be worth it in the end, though. 😉 Here’s to the three of you!

  6. Selena Parsley said

    I agree with Gary. *waves to Gary* I cannot imagine turning my back on my son and making him leave his home I don’t care for what reason. I am sorry this happened to you.

    LDRs can work! That’s how we started off. It can be charming and romantic because you have to be a little more creative, but then it can feel overwhelmingly lonesome at times. It’s bittersweet, but they can work. Now 13 years of being in the marriage, honestly, I have to remind myself that when we made our vows it wasn’t for THAT day, the big sappy wedding day with the flowers, fireworks, etc. It was for 13 years down the line when life can be monotonous, dirty socks, bills, etc That’s when reality kicks in.

  7. *waves back at Selena*

    “It can be charming and romantic because you have to be a little more creative…”

    That is very true. My last relationship was an LDR and I found my creative, romantic skills improved rapidly. Valentine’s day I sent her a couple of big presents, and some silly little ones. Each was wrapped and numbered, and I wouldn’t let her open them until she answered some (very easy) questions about “us”. I stretched it out all day over the phone and the Net, and it was very special. It could have been a thoroughly miserable day, but we made it fun and loving.

  8. Mike said

    Well, that’s the thing. When it’s a long distance thing, you get to know the other person more fully as a person without having the chance to be as physical as you might want; lots of couples who meet in an ordinary way start with the physical and then find out when that wears off that they don’t even really like each other that much. What we found was that we really, really like each other as people; my gf is the best friend I’ve ever had. That makes us totally strong as a couple.

  9. Selena Parsley said

    Makes me think of this song. I love me some Elton! *Sigh*

    Don’t wish it away
    Don’t look at it like it’s forever
    Between you and me
    I could honestly say
    That things can only get better

    And while I’m away
    Dust out the demons inside
    And it won’t be long
    Before you and me run
    To the place in our hearts
    Where we hide

    And I guess that’s why
    They call it the blues
    Time on my hands
    Could be time spent with you
    Laughing like children
    Living like lovers
    Rolling like thunder under the covers
    And I guess that’s why
    They call it the blues

    Just stare into space
    Picture my face in your hands
    Live for each second
    Without hesitation
    And never forget I’m your man

    Without me girl
    Cry in the night if it helps
    But more than ever I simply love you
    More than I love life itself

    And I guess that’s why
    They call it the blues
    Time on my hands
    Could be time spent with you
    Laughing like children
    Living like lovers
    Rolling like thunder under the covers
    And I guess that’s why
    They call it the blues

    Wait on me girl
    Cry in the night if it helps
    But more than ever I simply love you
    More than I love life itself

    And I guess that’s why
    They call it the blues
    Time on my hands
    Could be time spent with you
    Laughing like children
    Living like lovers
    Rolling like thunder under the covers
    And I guess that’s why
    They call it the blues

    Here’s the vid.

    Elton John – I Guess That’s Why They Call It The Blues

  10. Selena Parsley said

    Where did my comment go? I did get blacklisted! Bummer.

  11. Mike said

    Stuck in moderation.

  12. Selena Parsley said

    I hate being stuck in moderation, it’s dark and cold in there, and it smells and I swear, it WASN’T ME! 😀

  13. Mike's Girl said

    I’m at a loss for words. Well, almost.

    Thank you, Baby! You have moved me to tears, as you often do. (Don’t worry, they’re good tears.)

    I love you in all the same ways and for all the same reasons. There are not enough words in all the languages of the world to express my love for you.

    You’ll be in my dreams, as always.

  14. Mike said

    *starts humming “Isn’t She Lovely”*

    That’s my girl 🙂

  15. Mike's Girl said

    What a beautiful song, Selena! Appropriate too. Thanks for the link. I haven’t heard that in years. It’s now on the list of Our Songs. 🙂

  16. Mike's Girl said

    Here’s one for you, Honey. It’s from my heart:

    Only YouThe Platters

    Only you can make this world seem right
    Only you can make the darkness bright
    Only you, and you alone
    Can thrill me like you do
    And fill my heart with love for only you

    Only you can make this change in me
    For it’s true, you are my destiny
    When you hold my hand
    I understand the magic that you do

    You’re my dream come true
    My one and only you

    Only you can make this change in me
    For it’s true, you are my destiny
    When you hold my hand
    I understand the magic that you do

    You’re my dream come true
    My one and only you

    One and only you

  17. Selena Parsley said

    *waves to “Mike’s Girl.”

    “What a beautiful song, Selena! Appropriate too. Thanks for the link. I haven’t heard that in years. It’s now on the list of Our Songs.”

    Sweet! My husband and I had a LDR as well, not as long as you guys though!He was in the army.

    You guys are romantic. It’s sweet.
    *pushes hubby in here to get some pointers!* 😀

    We don’t have a list of “our songs” but there is one song that meant / means alot to us during our time apart. It still makes me sigh and brings back that feeling of nostalgia, you know what I mean?

    I See Your Smile – Gloria Estefan
    Here’s the vid:

    I get a little tongue-twisted
    Ev’ry time I talk to you, when I see you
    And I’m so glad that you just missed it
    The way I stared to memorize your face
    To kiss you in my mind
    Love you all the time

    (Chorus 1:)
    ‘Cause, when I close my eyes
    I still can see your smile
    It’s bright enough to light my life
    Out of my darkest hour
    Please believe it’s true
    When I tell you I love you

    I’ve taken too many chances
    Searching for the truth in love that’s in my heart
    Tell me if I’ve made the wrong advances
    Tell me if i’ve made you feel ashamed
    ‘Cause I know I have to do this
    Would you hold my hand right through it?

    (Repeat chorus 1)

    (Bridge:)
    I had to let you know just what would happen
    Yes, I had to let you know the truth
    I know I’ve got to do this
    Would you hold my hand right through it?
    Would you?

    (Chorus 2:)
    ‘Cause, when I close my eyes
    I still can see your smile
    It’s bright enough to light my life
    Out of my darkest hour

    (Chorus 3:)
    ‘Cause, when I close my eyes
    I still can see your smile
    It’s bright enough to light my life
    Out of my darkest hour
    I know now this is true
    When I tell you I love you

  18. Selena Parsley said

    After 13 years, we’ve had our share of romance, thrills, chills, dirty laundry, paying bills, we just get straight down to it and say:

    Just kidding….sort of 😀

    *note to self, stay off of youtube!*

  19. Mike said

    Aww, shucks. My girl’s great 😀

  20. Selena Parsley said

    “Aww, shucks. My girl’s great”

    Both of y’all are cute! Y’all are even almost as cute as me 😉

    You guys have a nice Christmas/Holiday. I am not sure if atheist celebrate Christmas or perhaps light a candle in Darwin’s memory or whatever, but you know what I mean…

  21. Almost as cute as you, yes, Selena — but your cuteness will always be unrivaled in my eyes 😉

    Lighting a candle for Darwin 🙂 What a great idea! I dunno about Mike and His Girl, but… well, I blogged yesterday about my conflicting thoughts on Christmas, but generally I enjoy and celebrate (in my way) the “spirit” of it.

  22. Selena Parsley said

    “I blogged yesterday about my conflicting thoughts on Christmas, but generally I enjoy and celebrate (in my way) the “spirit” of it.”

    I know. I read it! 😀

    “Almost as cute as you, yes, Selena — but your cuteness will always be unrivaled in my eyes.”
    Awww. Well, then I have a video/song for you. It’s beautiful lyrically and emotionally romantic and one of my top three faves of all time! *sighs*

    REM ~ Losing My Religion

    life is bigger
    It’s bigger than you
    And you are not me
    The lengths that I will go to
    The distance in your eyes
    Oh no, I’ve said too much
    I set it up

    (chorus)
    That’s me in the corner
    That’s me in the spotlight, I’m
    Losing my religion
    Trying to keep up with you
    And I don’t know if I can do it
    Oh no, I’ve said too much
    I haven’t said enough
    I thought that I heard you laughing
    I thought that I heard you sing
    I think I thought I saw you try

    Every whisper
    Of every waking hour I’m
    Choosing my confessions
    Trying to keep an eye on you
    Like a hurt lost and blinded fool, fool
    Oh no, I’ve said too much
    I set it up
    Consider this
    Consider this
    The hint of the century
    Consider this
    The slip that brought me
    To my knees failed
    What if all these fantasies
    Come flailing around
    Now I’ve said too much
    I thought that I heard you laughing
    I thought that I heard you sing
    I think I thought I saw you try

    But that was just a dream
    That was just a dream

    (repeat chorus)

    But that was just a dream
    Try, cry, why try?
    That was just a dream
    Just a dream, just a dream
    Dream

  23. Mike said

    I saw and enjoyed that, acksherlee. I don’t have much to say about xmas besides arseholes to it.

  24. Selena… this hubby of yours… not very big, is he? And not the jealous, violent typre… right? 🙂

    Heading down to Cuba with The Hitch, Mike?

    *waves to Mike’s Girl*

  25. Selena Parsley said

    He’s over 6 feet, not violent, but he is trained killer with cat like reflexes, I don’t know what this means (cat like reflexes),but he told me to say it. *rolls eyes* 😀

  26. Mike said

    Nah, I just avoid it wherever possible. Helps to be estranged from relatives on that account.

  27. Cat-like relexes, huh? Trained killer? Uh-huh. Okaaaaay. See you around, Selena! 🙂 (I’m not a coward or anything, ‘onest, but I’ve been around long enough to know that even untrained killer husbands can hurt a bit, so I err on the side of caution 🙂 )

    Yeah, I can imagine, Mike… you’ll be spending a lot of time online, chatting to a certain lady, yes?

  28. Mike said

    On the phone, in fact. Not running up a huge bill by virtue of phone cards: the impressive but stupidly-named Go Loco! one is most reliable and offers best value, IMNSHO.

  29. […] do much blogging. I’ve been readjusting to being at work again, adjusting to not being around my wife anymore, and I’ve had a horrible chest […]

  30. […] away, there is more time for real communication. Mike explains this very well in a comment under Talking ’bout my girl… at The Odd Blog: Well, that’s the thing. When it’s a long distance thing, you get to know the […]

  31. saintpaulgrrl said

    This is the first I’ve read your blog, Mike, although I’ve communicated with your lovely wife on a couple of occasions and made her acquaintance through a mutual blog “friend” we have. I did not know any of the details of your LDR. I’m sending you both all the best wishes I possibly can and hope that the day will come, sooner than later, when you’ll all be under one roof as a family!

  32. Mike said

    Thanks for coming by 🙂 That’s really nice of you to say that.

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