The Odd Blog

And when our cubs grow / We'll show you what war is good for

Well, crud.

Posted by That Other Mike on 16/01/2008

I was hoping this would be a difficult and embarrassingly highbrow blog, but apparently I’ll have go with reaching you proles instead.


23 Responses to “Well, crud.”

  1. nectarfizz said

    don’t feel bad, I got an elementary score. LOL

  2. Mike said

    I guess my dreams of literary domination will have to wait.

  3. Harvard Graduate.

  4. Okay… you’ll only run my URL and check… junior fecking high.

  5. Mike said

    I would’ve believed you first time </loyal friend>

  6. Selena Parsley said

    I am certain mine would be an elementary score but that’s alright.

    I am not as think as you dumb I am…

  7. Selena Parsley said

    Mine is high school, too. It’s only because I copy and past so many things from other writers. Otherwise it would be preschool.

  8. Mike said

    I’m sure it would be perfectly high-school-y without.

  9. Selena Parsley said


  10. Something’s wrong, Selena… he’s being nice to both of us! 😉 Well, sorta, in your case lol

  11. Selena Parsley said

    I think he feels sorry for me…kinda like “stupid Christian keeps coming to the wrong blog….and she won’t go away…maybe she’s retarded…poor thing.” Hehe 🙂

  12. *splutters tea on his ‘puter screen*

    He ever says that, get your guns out. That’ll shut him up 😉

  13. Mike said

    I’m just setting you both up for unpleasant remarks later on, you shower of bastards.

    Oh, crap. Too early.

  14. “Oh, crap. Too early.” Try naming the 1966 England World Cup team, dude 😉

  15. Selena Parsley said

    I personally prefer nice Mike better, even if it is a setup, but that is kind of a bummer. I like your sarcasm though, but just not directed at me hehe. Gotta go.

  16. Mike said

    Points to whoever knows this:

    I’m the meanest man that ever had a brain,
    All I scatter is aches and pains.
    I’m carbolic acid and the poison face,
    And I stand flatfooted in favour of crime and disgrace.
    If I ever done a good deed — I’m sorry of it.

    I’m mean in the East, mean in the West,
    Mean to the people that I like the best.
    I go around a-causin’ lot of accidents,
    And I push folks down, and I cause train wrecks.
    I’m a big disaster — just goin’ somewhere’s to happen.
    I’m an organized famine — studyin’ now I can be a little bit meaner.
    I’m still a whole lot too good to suit myself — just mean…

    I ride around on the subway trains,
    Laughin’ at the tight shoes dealin’ you pain.
    And I laugh when the car shakes from side to side,
    I laugh my loudest when other people cry.
    Can’t help it — I was born good, I guess,
    Just like you or anybody else —
    But then I… just turned off mean..

    I hate ev’rybody don’t think like me,
    And I’d rather see you dead than I’d ever see you free.
    Rather see you starved to death
    Than see you at work —
    And I’m readin’ all the books I can
    To learn how to hurt —
    Daily Misery — spread diseases,
    Keep you without no vote,
    Keep you without no union.

    Well, I hurt when I see you gettin’ ‘long so well,
    I’d ten times rather see you in the fires of hell.
    I can’t stand to fixed… see you there all fixed up in that house so nice,
    I’d rather keep you in that rotten hole, with the bugs and the lice,
    And the roaches, and the termites,
    And the sand fleas, and the tater bugs,
    And the grub worms, and the stingarees,
    And the tarantulas, and the spiders, childs of the earth,
    The ticks and the blow-flies —
    These is all of my little angels
    That go ’round helpin’ me do the best parts of my meanness.
    And mosquiters…

    Well, I used to be a pretty fair organized feller,
    Till I turned a scab and then I turned off yeller,
    Fought ev’ry union with teeth and toenail,
    And I sprouted a six-inch stinger right in the middle of the tail,
    And I growed horns…
    And then I cut ’em off, I wanted to fool you.
    I hated union ever’where,
    ‘Cause God likes unions
    And I hate God!

    Well, if I can get the fat to hatin’ the lean
    That’d tickle me more than anything I’ve seen,
    Then get the colors to fightin’ one another,
    And friend against friend, and brother… and sister against brother,
    That’ll be just it.
    Everybody’s brains a-boilin’ in turpentine,
    And their teeth fallin’ out all up and down the streets,
    That’ll just suit me fine.
    ‘Cause I hate ever’thing that’s union,
    And I hate ever’thing that’s organized,
    And I hate ever’thing that’s planned,
    And I love to hate and I hate to love!
    I’m mean, I’m just mean…

  17. Selena Parsley said

    “And I growed horns…
    And then I cut ‘em off, I wanted to fool you.”

    Here is my favorite mean, hate, angst-ridden song.

  18. Guthry, Mike?

  19. Mike said

    Good old Woody Guthrie.

    Selena: You can tell how angst-ridden and in touch with teenage culture they because there’s cigarettes and JD in the video. </snark> Jeez, though… Christian emo-rock-pop? Give me some warning next time :p

  20. Selena Parsley said

    They are not a Christian band, I rarely listen to christian music :p Speaking of emo, I have to send this highly favored disturbing classic.

  21. Hey guys, I got an “Elementary Level” on my blog. Mayhap it is because I have made up words on there. I was hoping for “Nobel Laureate.” Oh well.

  22. I was bored, so I ran Shakespeare’s Titus Andronicus through it. The result? Junior High! 🙂

  23. Selena Parsley said

    I know. I made up a blog to test it, and it said genius :p

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